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Wednesday, May 9, 2012
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Thursday, February 9, 2012
What Defines ME....
I wrote this on my Mother's Birthday 12-19-2011
I have something to say - ME - The Person I am defined as first - 'A Girl', then 'A Woman', 'A Wife', and 'A Mother'. I do this with 150% of my power -
I learned this from my Father - "DO NOT DO ANYTHING WITH HALF EFFORT (Except he said it in a different manner if you can imagine the explicit version), and if that is the case where you can't do it right the first time, then don't do it at all."
I learned to do this with ALL the love and care and MAGIC I can scrape out of my soul - For those who have impacted my life as well as everyone else in my life. When I am the most exhausted I can feel or discouraged, I can always find more love, more care, more MAGIC in me - for THEM! That is what my Mother taught me! She always had more love, care, and magic in her. Even when she is at her lowest. We (My Brothers and I) just never knew until we were older to understand.
I learned that to do all of this, I need to try to do something to 'refresh' every now and then. And, to stay firm - sometimes tough love when needed with a gentle heart as well. Staying organized physically and mentally - to make it all work seamlessly - From Sheri (my Stepmother).
And, last but not least, every tough heart can be softened, and to always remember - HAVE FUN - Thanks to Bob (my Stepfather).
Thank you ALL for giving me a piece of ME! This isn't all that I learned from each and every one of you guys. But, these are just some of my treasured gifts that make me...ME. And, I am truly grateful that all of you are in these important roles in my life.
What all keeps these wonderful gift together and defines the intimate attributes of myself is...God and Jesus. They add even more to me that just completes it all. What they have taught...through many angels throughout my life... is humility, patience and so much more...including bravery and courage. Because, with all the important things I learned, I was and will be able to put it together to make all them proud.
I am thankful for all four of those people and the Higher Power that gives myself true meaning in my life and self worth - to keep going and making a positive stamp in people's lives. I hope I do ALL of them proud! They sure all make me proud to be the person, true self that I am, and have become after all these yars, I feel truly blessed. I used to say I was lucky, but you know, luck has NOTHING to do with it ---GOD DOES!! He made it ALL. Without Him, I am nothing. There is a reason for everything and He shows me that meaning, piece by piece, person by person, and moment by moment.
I have something to say - ME - The Person I am defined as first - 'A Girl', then 'A Woman', 'A Wife', and 'A Mother'. I do this with 150% of my power -
I learned this from my Father - "DO NOT DO ANYTHING WITH HALF EFFORT (Except he said it in a different manner if you can imagine the explicit version), and if that is the case where you can't do it right the first time, then don't do it at all."
I learned to do this with ALL the love and care and MAGIC I can scrape out of my soul - For those who have impacted my life as well as everyone else in my life. When I am the most exhausted I can feel or discouraged, I can always find more love, more care, more MAGIC in me - for THEM! That is what my Mother taught me! She always had more love, care, and magic in her. Even when she is at her lowest. We (My Brothers and I) just never knew until we were older to understand.
I learned that to do all of this, I need to try to do something to 'refresh' every now and then. And, to stay firm - sometimes tough love when needed with a gentle heart as well. Staying organized physically and mentally - to make it all work seamlessly - From Sheri (my Stepmother).
And, last but not least, every tough heart can be softened, and to always remember - HAVE FUN - Thanks to Bob (my Stepfather).
Thank you ALL for giving me a piece of ME! This isn't all that I learned from each and every one of you guys. But, these are just some of my treasured gifts that make me...ME. And, I am truly grateful that all of you are in these important roles in my life.
What all keeps these wonderful gift together and defines the intimate attributes of myself is...God and Jesus. They add even more to me that just completes it all. What they have taught...through many angels throughout my life... is humility, patience and so much more...including bravery and courage. Because, with all the important things I learned, I was and will be able to put it together to make all them proud.
I am thankful for all four of those people and the Higher Power that gives myself true meaning in my life and self worth - to keep going and making a positive stamp in people's lives. I hope I do ALL of them proud! They sure all make me proud to be the person, true self that I am, and have become after all these yars, I feel truly blessed. I used to say I was lucky, but you know, luck has NOTHING to do with it ---GOD DOES!! He made it ALL. Without Him, I am nothing. There is a reason for everything and He shows me that meaning, piece by piece, person by person, and moment by moment.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Powell Family Tragedy
http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/02/07/10339866-report-powell-left-apologetic-voicemail-minutes-before-death
I have been trying to hide from this horrific events since the minute it happened. But, unfortunately, with the media, that is extremely impossible. So, I thought to myself, if I can't get away from it, there must be a reason why I must have knowledge of it. So, I opened my eyes, as my heart was already weeping, and dove into the blackness of this story.
I must say, with the simple fact of knowing that a father who did not want to live for one reason or another, and taking his kids with him caused me to instantaneously cry uncontrollably. I held my youngest in my arms at that moment and did not want to let him go, for fear of ever losing him in any way, shape, or form. And, I was simply very confused. As we are all asking this question, "If you do not want to be a part of this world, why take those two innocent and beautiful babies with you?"
Holding back tears, I continued on to learn of the ghastly details that, I am sure, ripped in to the hearts of millions around the world. As I read on, the words flew by my eyes so fast, that I was hoping MSNBC had missed a typo in their story. Did I actually see the words, "Chop Wounds"? Reading this, my body literally felt faint, and it was a good thing I was sitting, because I would have passed out. I had forgotten to breathe for what seemed like 5 minutes after reading on as to WHAT that FATHER did to his own children before taking their lives and his own. I did not realize I hadn't taken a breath in so long, that my body finally made me gasp for air.
This case has been closely followed by the media since the beginning. How could this happen? Listen, I have had my fair share of issues with supervised visitation, and am extremely surprised that on such a high profile case, there was only one social worker involved with visitation at the Father's home. I would at least think they would have to have the visitation at a neutral place. Especially, since it has been claimed by the Cox Family that the fear of the Father's wretched behavior was communicated to the courts and police, resulting in no follow-up nor action what-so-ever.
Although this story, by no means, will ever be considered a happy ending in any way, shape, or form, there is one small ray of sunshine that peeks through the dark layers and layers of clouds after this enormous and evil storm. When asked what was getting them by or giving them peace, their answer is a testimony to all of us! They explained that their FAITH is what bonds them and keeps them strong. They explained on national television in front of everyone and anyone watching that knowing their Grandchildren were now with their Mother in Heaven and that they feel no pain gives them inner peace.
Wow. I must say, Thanks be to God!!! My hats off to them to show all who is and was watching just how important it is to have Jesus in our lives. He is the glue that sticks us all together and shows us the right way in life. It is times like these that we cannot fathom such a horrific timeline of events would ever transpire. Although, we have HIM to rest on and give our grief to. When we are asking the questions of 'Why' or 'How Could Someone Ever', just know that there are things that we will never and shouldn't ever understand. That is why HE is there, to shield our eyes and let us know that even in the darkest of hours, HE is always there consoling and strengthening us.
Thank You Cox Family for being and AMAZING Testimony to ALL!!!! May God Bless You and Be With You During These Darkest Hours!!!
I have been trying to hide from this horrific events since the minute it happened. But, unfortunately, with the media, that is extremely impossible. So, I thought to myself, if I can't get away from it, there must be a reason why I must have knowledge of it. So, I opened my eyes, as my heart was already weeping, and dove into the blackness of this story.
I must say, with the simple fact of knowing that a father who did not want to live for one reason or another, and taking his kids with him caused me to instantaneously cry uncontrollably. I held my youngest in my arms at that moment and did not want to let him go, for fear of ever losing him in any way, shape, or form. And, I was simply very confused. As we are all asking this question, "If you do not want to be a part of this world, why take those two innocent and beautiful babies with you?"
Holding back tears, I continued on to learn of the ghastly details that, I am sure, ripped in to the hearts of millions around the world. As I read on, the words flew by my eyes so fast, that I was hoping MSNBC had missed a typo in their story. Did I actually see the words, "Chop Wounds"? Reading this, my body literally felt faint, and it was a good thing I was sitting, because I would have passed out. I had forgotten to breathe for what seemed like 5 minutes after reading on as to WHAT that FATHER did to his own children before taking their lives and his own. I did not realize I hadn't taken a breath in so long, that my body finally made me gasp for air.
This case has been closely followed by the media since the beginning. How could this happen? Listen, I have had my fair share of issues with supervised visitation, and am extremely surprised that on such a high profile case, there was only one social worker involved with visitation at the Father's home. I would at least think they would have to have the visitation at a neutral place. Especially, since it has been claimed by the Cox Family that the fear of the Father's wretched behavior was communicated to the courts and police, resulting in no follow-up nor action what-so-ever.
Although this story, by no means, will ever be considered a happy ending in any way, shape, or form, there is one small ray of sunshine that peeks through the dark layers and layers of clouds after this enormous and evil storm. When asked what was getting them by or giving them peace, their answer is a testimony to all of us! They explained that their FAITH is what bonds them and keeps them strong. They explained on national television in front of everyone and anyone watching that knowing their Grandchildren were now with their Mother in Heaven and that they feel no pain gives them inner peace.
Wow. I must say, Thanks be to God!!! My hats off to them to show all who is and was watching just how important it is to have Jesus in our lives. He is the glue that sticks us all together and shows us the right way in life. It is times like these that we cannot fathom such a horrific timeline of events would ever transpire. Although, we have HIM to rest on and give our grief to. When we are asking the questions of 'Why' or 'How Could Someone Ever', just know that there are things that we will never and shouldn't ever understand. That is why HE is there, to shield our eyes and let us know that even in the darkest of hours, HE is always there consoling and strengthening us.
Thank You Cox Family for being and AMAZING Testimony to ALL!!!! May God Bless You and Be With You During These Darkest Hours!!!
Monday, February 6, 2012
I See HIM in him...
My First Blog....Here We Go
Have you ever felt incredibly nervous to just let it all out on the table? No holding back. This is it. This is my opinion, how I feel. I have been dreaming of doing that for years and have kicked myself for not doing so and waiting so long. My life could be written in a novel. But, I have always been afraid to write any of it down for fear of what people would think or say. I find it comical how most therapist/counselors (no, I do not have one) encourage writing down your thoughts and feelings down. As though it will make you feel better and would be a turn for positive progress in your life. But, sadly, is this day in society so many people twist others words to suit their needs at the time in getting what they want, what ever that may be. I must say, I applaud all you bloggers out there that have been blogging for so long. As, it is difficult to get over that 'fear' hurdle in doing so. I am happy to be a part of the blogger family. We will see where this journey takes us and what roads it leads me (and you) down. You will be surprised the stories I have to share, if I have the courage to do so. Thank you, and God Bless.
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